Recently a reader submitted this question:
“Are some people just meant to be alone forever? Like do their spirit guides just decide they don’t get to experience love? Is it some karmic consequence because you were a bad person in another life? Should I just stop looking?”
I read for a lot of clients who are looking for marriage or a long-term partnership. Some have had relationships in the past that didn’t pan out, and some have never had a partner even after decades of being here on Earth and actively looking.
First let me say that there is no one on the other side preventing someone from finding love. No one is blocking you from being with a loving partner.
It doesn’t matter what you’ve done in a past life, this life is a clean slate. Not having a partner is not punishment for something you did in a past life.
There are many reasons you may not have found love this time around. Yet.
You Have Very High Standards
I read for a lot of clients who have made their “list” of what they want in a partner and there’s nothing wrong with that. It’s so important to know what you want so you recognize it when you see it.
But sometimes those lists are fairly unrealistic. What they want in a partner is basically perfection. Ask yourself how many people in your life are perfect, who don’t have some flaw, or something they are working on. Ask yourself if you would make someone’s list.
Set realistic expectations. Pick a few deal-breaker items and concentrate on finding someone who ticks as many boxes as possible.
You Have Very Low Standards
I also read for clients who are so desperate to be in a relationship that they will accept someone into their lives who is toxic, abusive, narcissistic, an addict, deeply in debt, or might even already be married to someone else.
These relationships might seem like “better than nothing” at first but they can really erode your sense of well-being and your joy in life.
Being alone might be better than having a really bad relationship.
You’re Waiting for Mr. or Ms. Right to Fall from the Sky
Great partners don’t just magically appear in your living room. You’ve got to find them out in the world. Whether that’s looking online, or letting your friends set you up, or going to events in your area, you have to put yourself in the path of the kind of partner you want.
Ask yourself what your ideal partner does for work or what they do on the weekend? Are they at sporting events? Doing archery? Hiking? In a book club? Traveling to exotic places? Do they volunteer with the Red Cross or Habitat for Humanity? Do they attend business seminars? Do they like to quilt?
Find people who like to do what you like to do and do it with them. Nothing makes inroads faster than sharing a hobby or passion for something.
Make Sure You’re a Fit for your Ideal Partner
I had a client recently tell me she wanted a man who was very fit, made a 7-figure salary, and would treat her like a princess, waiting on her hand and foot. But she herself was broke, never exercised, and didn’t want to wait on her man hand and foot.
So her guides had to ask her if her ideal partner would be attracted to her energy. After some reflection she admitted that she probably wasn’t the greatest partner even though she expected her partner to be perfect and take care of her.
Attraction is going to be mutual, so if you don’t like the kind of partners you’re attracting, you may need make some changes in your own life to be a better vibrational match for what you desire.
Bottom Line
If you want to find love, the universe isn’t going to stop you, but you’ve got to make sure you’re looking for someone realistic, who is a vibrational match for who you are and what you want, and you need to find them in their natural habitat.
